Another funeral

I have another funeral to attend this year. My cousin died late last night/early this morning. The only thing going through my head now is who's the third?
--------------
Turns out there were two kids who he didn't know in the car with him when it crashed. They left him in the car. One of them is in custody.

Welcome to the Windy City

It's wintertime. Last night sucked. All night, the wind was blowing and the whole dropping 30 degrees in a short period of time. I found out that my apartment has cross-ventilation. I love how my door, which had the deadbolt on, rattled the whole time. Before leaving work, the fog was so thick that you couldn't see outside from the window behind my desk. This morning, I was too stupid to pull out my scarf before leaving for work. The morning wasn't so bad and the snow was kind of cool to watch from the window, but it was all I could do to get to the bus stop walking against the wind. At least it pushed me to my apartment. It was the first time that I was glad that the management has the heat cranked up.

I think tomorrow I will go shopping. My paycheck should be available to spend and I need new shoes. Considering there are several blocks of shops near work, it might be hard to choose.

Relationships and songs

Basically, I have a couple of attitudes towards dating. One, right now I don't have the time to worry about it. I'm too concerned about learning everything for work and getting settled in the city and my new apartment. Once things settle down, then maybe I'll concentrate more on it. I don't have time to mess with everything that comes with it. Two, it will happen when it will happen. Not really worried about it right now. (Granted, I've never been in a relationship, so maybe that affects my outlook.) So here are some song lyrics that kind of sum that up.

You say you fell while holding diamonds in your hands
"It's your fault for running, holding diamonds," I said
And I offer no sympathy for that
I hear that it was you who died alone
And I offer no sympathy for that
Better off I sparkle on my own
And someday love will find me in the rough
Someday love will finally be enough
. . . .
I got your love letters
I threw them all away
And I hear you think that I'm crazy
I'm driving 95
And I'm driving you away
And I shine a little more lately
Anna Nalick "In the Rough"

I don't wanna be no man's woman
It don't make me happy this mantrolling
Thing that you got for me so I become
No man's woman
I don't wanna be no man's woman
I've other work I want to get done
I haven't traveled this far to become
No man's woman
No Man's woman
Cuz I'm tired of it
And I'm so scared of it
That I'll never trust again
Cuz a man could fake you
Take your soul and make you
Miserable in so much pain
Sinead O'Connor "No Man's Woman"

It's the last thing that I need right now
Someone to bring me down
And I've got a rule that I've made up now he moved out
No way, no boys allowed
And there's a reason why I keep my distance
Don't think you're gonna understand
This is the last thing that I need right now
...........
Don't need a boyfriend
Not one like him
Don't wanna be the foolish girl I was
And end up worse again
You can say it's from me
I'll be keeping away
Don't wanna be the same foolish girl again
Diana Anaid "Last Thing"

.....I tell them I am not afraid to be alone
And there's no need to rush into something wrong
So I'm not gonna worry
No I'm in no hurry
It's in the hands of fate
There's nothing I can do
And it might be tomorrow
Or the one that follows
Got the rest of my life to look forward to
Cause everyday is one day closer to you
You might be in Montana
Living in the hills
Or you might be in Virginia
Workin' in a mill
All I know is that I haven't found you yet
But who knows maybe we've already met
Carolyn Dawn Johnson "One Day Closer to You"

Goodbye buddy

Aug16108
Originally uploaded by nikkigubb.

Your suffering is over. You will be missed.

Staying put

As tempting as the FedEx envelope is, I have decided to stay put. Maybe I can try again in a couple of years. Everyone is too nice and the company seems to get that a happy employee is a productive employee. How many companies give out bundles of Tootsie Roll Pops, Pez dispensers, and pencils with smiley face erasers for those brave enough to answer questions at open enrollment? How many are willing to absorb the increasing costs? Granted, it is a unique industry, but still.

I probably should tell some of my friends that I'm no longer in Goshen. Especially since I haven't heard from a particular someone in a long time who was always reliable for connecting. I wonder if her husband has something to do with that.

I managed to get some unpacking done this past weekend. I guess the thought of leaving made me want to settle down in the apartment. I even pulled out some decorations. I also put the first of personal touches to my cubicle.

My dad and grandma came to see me yesterday. He came to bring me my mail and help me stock up my kitchen. I also found out that our older 20 lb cat hadn't ate anything in a couple of days and the only water was what they spoon fed him. But it's just a simple infection so he gets special canned cat food to help build up his strength and pills forced down his throat. But it could have been much worse.

My apartment is in a bad location. There is a Barnes & Noble AND a Borders within walking distance. Somehow I've managed to resist the temptation of spending my whole check on new books. No telling how long I will be able to keep myself out, especially if I don't unpack my books soon.

Is it wrong to want a PS2 just so I can play the Karaoke Revolution games?

Well, to bed I said.

Hmm

I got a thick FedEx envelope at my home today. My dad went ahead and opened it because he knew what it was. I have a job offer. Two weeks after I started the job for which I interviewed the same day. What to do, what to do. Of course, the flip side is, with my luck, turning down this position would probably resulted in the plain vague no go letter.

It's a stream

I got the "final" list of clients today so I can officially start working.

It's been too long since I've been to a karaoke night.

I need to go grocery shopping. Then I need to make a unnecessary purchase with my first check from my first "real" job. Maybe a real copy of Alias Season One to (shh) replace my illegal copy. Then eventually Seasons Two through Four. And NewsRadio. And Titus Season Three. And..........

I really need a Chicago Card.

baby i've been here before
i've seen this room and i've walked this floor
i used to live alone before i knew you
i've seen your flag on the marble arch
but love is not a victory march
it's a cold and it's a broken hallelujah
......
well, maybe there's a god above
but all i've ever learned from love was
how to shoot somebody who outdrew you
it's not a cry that you hear at night
it's not somebody who's seen the light
it's a cold and it's a broken hallelujah
Jeff Buckley, Hallelujah

How many different things has played Jeff Buckley's "Hallelujah"? Off the top of my head, West Wing episode where CJ's Secret Service agent (Mark Harmon) dies and the movie Shrek.

I wonder if my free album for Connect is still good. Maybe I can get the Anna Nalick one off there.

I need to do some more unpacking because it's only a couple of weeks before Thanksgiving.

Is it wrong that a work security card makes me feel a little more important?

Rum is yum.

I still need to fill out a change of address form for the USPS.

What if I decided to be a singer instead? Can't you see me in a bar doing covers with a band?

Hey, it's the Sloane Clone (aka Joel Gray) on Law and Order: Criminal Intent!

Night all